Are you suffering from the childhood loss of a parent?
If you are, you are not alone. I was shocked by the number of children who lost a parent by death each year, but death isn’t the only way to lose a parent. Other ways to lose a parent are abandonment, abuse, addiction, adoption, divorce, indifference, military deployment, prison and sickness.
You can experience loss of your parent when they are not available to you, even if they are alive.
If you lost your parent, you are aware of what I am talking about although you might not have thought of it in these terms.
There is no need to compare your loss with other’s loss.
Loss is loss and it will be felt, experienced and perceived differently by different people. But there are common elements in healing. As we have learned in life, every action has a reaction. There are consequences to those of us left in the wake of a loss when we are children. Yes, people definitely can suffer from loss when they are adults.
The difference is, as an adult, we have more choices and more capacity to deal with loss than when we are a child.
Adult is really after we are 25 years old. I know the 21 year olds might differ, but I say 25 because that is when the brain is completely developed.
This may be the first time you have ever read this blog or maybe you have read them for the last year.
If so you will know that I too lost my parents when I was a child.
For me, something happened that brought my situation to a head. I had to deal with the death of my parents or swallow very hard and ignore and pretend as I had always done. I have the Edwards stubborn streak in me and I had finally experienced something that I could not pretend was ok. And frankly, if it had just been me, I would most likely have swallowed my feelings, burying them once more as I had always done.
But this time, the memory of my parents was at stake.
I would take up for them, be there for them, in ways I had never been there for myself.
That is an imprint I’ve always had. I might let someone do something or say something to me and not stand up for myself, but I would take up for someone else.
Support is often an issue for people who lost a parent as a child, because, in childhood we lost our support.
Because support was so desired, I would definitely be a support for others because I wouldn’t want them to experience lack of support. Of course, I didn’t realize this at the time. That understanding came with time and work. Is support an issue for you?
It might not be support but another issue.
Do you ever wonder how much of your life you must give up because of loss from your childhood?
That means you aren’t completely available for your own life. In some ways, life passes you by because of your past. And that is why I have created Healing From Childhood Loss, a class based on my own experience drawn from my book, “A Texas Tragedy: Orphaned by Bootleggers.” I spend years healing and feel it is my duty, in fact my life’s calling, to offer these classes so others might get the help that I needed.
If you lost a parent when you were a child, no matter how the loss occurred, please join me.
Or if you are close to someone who lost their parent, please send this url to them. I’m counting down the days until the classes will be offered. First you will get an email with a video. And then you will be getting additional videos, a total of 4 with approximately three days between each video. And the last video will tell you about the classes.
Seriously consider this class. Why? If you are in therapy, this will make your therapy go faster because I will teach you what I learned in therapy, in practice and on my own journey. If you are not in therapy, this gives you a path to healing. You may need to go through the work numerous times, each time going deeper.
A clear path to healing is better than spending the rest of your life stuck in your childhood.
And, it is so important for your children that you do your own work. It will benefit them.
I had a person, who was over 80 years old, who told me she lost her mother when she was four years old and that she had suffered from that all of her life. She didn’t have a path to healing. You do.
Choose healing so you can enjoy the rest of your life in a way she couldn’t.
This is called loving yourself!
To see my videos, sign up at www.childhoodloss.com